Benson Yeung at Hong Kong Today

This week in Hong Kong, the breaking up of Joseph Ngai and Vivian Chow has been the hottest gossip. Joseph is a well known DJ and writer. Vivian was a singer and movie star but lately models for major fashion and cosmetic brand names. The couple has been through thick and thin over the past 19 years, marked by Joseph’s widely publicized involvement with other girls. The boy-and-girl friend relationship was apparently going steadier than most married couple before Joseph got drunk in a pub and kissed a young girl. This was photographed and the picture got into the press. Joseph explained that he only met the girl for the first time the same night but apparently kissed her after he got intoxicated. Vivian made a public statement that the situation was understandable and forgivable. Subsequently, the young girl Joseph was kissing was identified as Miss Zhang, a university student and her blog was exposed. Joseph had been mentioned and photgraphed in previous entries of the blog. What followed was a dramatic moving out of Joseph of their home and the couple’s individual statements that the media could now be satisfied that they were no longer together.
What do I make out of this?
1. The world is getting so small these days. Even private life of the you and me can be under the scrutiny of the world, thanks to the convenience that internet technology brings. I once google my name at google photos and found a non-published picture of myself at a hospital annual party. Your respectful blogger was not drunk and was posing with a dozen of smiling colleagues. Nonetheless, I didn’t mean to have that particular picture accessible to the world. Your privacy and mine is in dire strait.
2. The world is interested in negative behavior and bad news. Joseph has achieved various tasks in his long career, so has Vivian. They repeatedly help various charitable causes. None of these got mentioned in the recent reports. The Hong Kong mass media prefers sex, scandal and break-ups to loyalty, steadfast love and kindness.
3. You are responsible for your own happiness. If the world wants you separated, lonely and sad, it doesn’t mean you need to oblige and break up. You can keep on forgiving or receiving forgiveness. The community is guilty of infringing privacy and being cruel. However, it cannot be blamed for personal decisions regarding one’s own well-being and happiness. You cannot dictate what other people say. You can certainly determine how you would react to what they say.
4. We definitely need more forgiveness, tolerance, positive attitude in our community. Let the one without guile cast the first stone.

Photo credit: http://vivianchow.info

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